This morning my wife mentioned she has noticed that many young people do not know how to sew by hand. Not even, for instance, to secure a button to a shirt.
She made this comment after I shared that I’m glad I learned the rudiments of sewing in ‘home ec’ class in public middle school in the late 1970’s. I actually made an entire pillow by hand. Years later this knowledge served me well when I had to grab my wife’s needle and thread in an emergency with a farm animal. Something tells me this isn’t taught in public schools anymore.
I think the basics of sewing is one of those skills we all should have. Young and old, men and women. But I’m going to go out on a limb and say I think it is especially important for women. Why?
I will put it this way. Sewing is one of those little things that is expressive of something much bigger. It’s certainly not about the sewing itself. It’s most about a woman’s ability and calling to live that astounding reality called motherhood. It has been said that motherhood is at root a disposition of the heart. This strikes me as true.
This disposition of heart manifests itself in many forms; a common feature is a loving, careful attention to the concrete details of life. It is precisely in this vein that I think sewing was often seen as one of the staples of a young lady’s formation. Here is one particular skill she will use to take care of the people she loves, whether in making or mending clothes or home furnishing and decorations, or a plethora of other things.
I realize that sewing particularly raises the specter of rigid sexual divisions and stereotypes. This is probably one factor in the general setting aside of sewing. It is my hope here to suggest that perhaps we have come to the point where we can look again at things we’ve set aside. Unduly rigid sexual divisions are wrong and damaging. But this is no reason to miss the gift of sexual distinction and complementarity, the gift of motherhood and fatherhood. It is also no reason to miss the gift of sewing, for both women and men.
I think that boys and girls should learn the basics of sewing. Some of both sexes will be inspired to go beyond the basics and become proficient, and some will achieve the joy of mastery of a great art. I think that particularly girls might find that sewing serves them well no matter what they chose to pursue, but especially in marriage and household-living.
Xenophon wrote, “In so far as the two sexes have different natural talents…their pairing is mutually more beneficial.” I take ‘talents’ here to refer especially to complementary dispositions of heart and soul, which become manifest in our bodies, and in countless concrete ways.
Motherhood must never be reduced to any of its multiple manifestations. And most concrete arts of daily living, like sewing, will pertain to both men and women. Yet this should not prevent us from seeing a natural affinity and fittingness in offering to young women in particular the opportunity to develop an art well suited for a manifestation of motherliness.
And if nothing else, sewing offers to boys and girls alike the joy of an increasingly rare commodity among the young: a useful and satisfying hand competence. ~ ~ ~
A Short Video to help you ENJOY a special gift of the season: ACORNS!
Image: Lise Sewing by Pierre Auguste Renoir
Husband, father, and professor of Philosophy. LifeCraft springs from one conviction: there is an ancient wisdom about how to live the good life in our homes, with our families; and it is worth our time to hearken to it. Let’s rediscover it together. Learn more.
In addition to the benefits that you note in your post, hand sewing is also very relaxing. The rhythm of stitching and the long drawing out of the thread from the stitch soothe the soul. I hand sew curtains and the quilting for quilts (piecing by machine). Today we tend to hand sew while watching tv, but sewing can also be a calming way to sit and think alone, as did those women of the past who inspire us. Note that I have never been a stay at home mom but worked full time my entire adult life with children in the family. There should be no stigma attached to hand sewing. It is rewarding to do something so relaxing while creating or mending something useful to yourself and most often to others.
Thank you, Linda. I can really picture it as you describe it. It’s amazing how good hand-work can have so many different fruits!
I love this, and very much agree! I really took to sewing at a young age as a creative outlet after some basic instruction by my mother (I sewed too many doll clothes to count!) and used to pour over my grandmother’s books of sewing techniques and always had some needlework going when my father would read aloud before bed. I plan to teach all of my children to sew, both boys and girls, and I do see it as one of those basic life skills, like washing dishes, doing laundry, or cleaning a house. It’s a skill I’ve been so grateful to have at many times in my life.
Your children will be blessed in this, Sarah!
Your piece on sewing and hand sewing reminds me of all the handmade Christmas ornaments my children made using felt patterns of angels, snowmen, stars, gingerbread boys & gingerbread girls. We stuffed them with cotton balls & stitched them with the Blanket stitch, hung a piece of ribbon or cord & put them on our tree, or gave as gifts or sold at craft fairs.
I appreciate my mother who taught me how to mend & hem my clothes. It is a life skill for all of us. Thanks for bringing it to mind.
And thank you for sharing, Sharon.
I have a deep affection for sewing. My journey began as a young girl, when I was introduced to the craft. Although I never possessed extraordinary talent, I developed the invaluable ability to mend things. In turn, I passed on this skill to my children, three boys and one girl, with the primary goal of equipping them with the essential skill of mending. To my delight, my daughter and middle son displayed an interest in sewing, and they even took up crochet.
This aspect is particularly meaningful to me: Sewing embodies a commitment to self-reliance, instills a sense of care for objects, serves as an outlet for artistic expression, and carries forward the rich tradition of sewing. It also provides a platform for sharing my family’s way of life and the stories passed down to me about sewing. I can feel a connection to a lineage that extends from my grandmothers, teachers, and mother, likely reaching back through the generations to their mothers as well, all the way to my own children.
Deirdre, Thank you very much for sharing this. Everything you says rings so true–what a beautiful testimony.
I learned hand sewing from both my parents. My father was a scoutmaster, who often mended tents and tarps, or affixed patches to his garments. In his last years he became highly proficient at counted cross stitch, winning several blue ribbons at the county’s fair for his original designs. As a child, my mom patiently endured my practice, finger pricks and all, while I mastered a needle and thread. She crafted many garments for the family, and ultimately hand quilted the last several years of her life.
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