“Toil mastered everything, relentless toil. And the pressure of pinching poverty.”
Virgil, The Georgics
Most people I speak to say that there are too busy. For many, this busy-ness is a significant source of stress. We feel trapped; we feel constrained to attend to more things than we have time for.
So we live in an almost constant state of crisis, of heightened adrenal saturation. We move quickly from one thing to the next, feeling that we give proper attention to few things and do a half-baked job on the rest. We excuse ourselves because “we don’t have time” to do better, but something in us rebels against this constant self-exculpation.
Often we are acting from a real sense of responsibility. We take it as a matter of character to be willing to endure it all, and get everything done. So we push ourselves, and tell ourselves this is how it has to be.
And sometimes, indeed, it might just have to be this way. At least for a time. But I think we also need to recognize that there might be a real problem that we need to address. Perhaps we are too busy: too busy in the sense that it is incumbent on us to make ourselves less busy, somehow.
Our discernment and deliberation might look like this: Are there steps that I can and should take to thin out my commitments, for the sake of inner peace, and for the sake of the responsibilities, and persons (!), who might be suffering from my being overly busy?
Once we have honestly reckoned with this, then we can embrace our responsibilities with peace and confidence, and hopefully also a sense of humor.
Further, I think we do well to be aware of the extra burden that our modern context often places on us. I am convinced that common practices and patterns of the almost universal ‘suburban’ context, for lack of a better name, push us and at times require us to juggle more than a person reasonably should. I will point to one aspect of this.
A man I know who spent time living in an Amish community once shared an insight. He had wondered how the Amish could be very busy and productive while seemingly never rushed or overly burdened. Then he realized: so much of what they do had multiple levels of value. Many of their activities, for instance, were simultaneously productive, and social, and good for their bodies. At the end of their work day they had already had quality time together, and great exercise, and often recreation too. This makes a remarkable difference in the busy-ness of their day.
As Virgil’s words indicate, the requirements of the human condition will almost always entail certain burdens. But much remains in our power, as individuals and as a community. By putting first things first, and being intentional about our living patterns, I think we can reduce some unnecessary stress of being overly-busy. And the busy-ness that remains can take its meaning from the relationships and higher goods that require it.
A word on the IMAGE: It is a detail from Leon Lhermitte’s (1844-1925) “Paying of the Harvesters.” I must say that when I see this mower of fields, I feel that I see a man who knows relentless toil, but who is not mastered by it. He looks like a man whose work provides the simple rhythm of a life well lived. Even if I cannot replicate the simple dignity of his daily toils, I can try to replicate an inner attitude that puts faithfulness before success, and pursues excellence of a craft for the sake of those he serves.
Stress and Its Causes Mini-Series
II: Stress: The Lack of Presence in Our Lives
IV: Stress: News as a Backdrop for Life
V: The Stress of Relating to Our Spouse, or Anyone Else of the Other Sex
Virgil (70-19 B.C.) is the great Roman poet, author of The Aeneid and The Georgics. In the Divine Comedy he appears as Dante’s guide through hell and purgatory.
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Loved that insight about the Amish farmer. I would very much like a sketch of his day, and how they combine activities to be productive and also recreational.
I would as well! And I would love ideas/discussion about how we can incorporate that way of living into modern suburban life. Are there ways we can plan our activities so that they are social, active and productive, even though we usually don’t live close enough to family and friends to do chores together on a regular basis, etc.?
Dominic and Breana,
I really love this point to. It came from Eric Brende, who tells the story of his time living among the Amish in the book Better Off: Flipping the Switch on Technology.
It certainly will be difficult to replicate the extent to which the activities in a traditional close-knit community are multi-valenced. One thought is this: I am convinced that finding contexts for GOOD SHARED WORK is perhaps the most practical, and under-considered, way to cultivate shared life together in a way that can be productive, social, and recreative all at the same time. I know the difficulty is still in the details. It is hard to find time and context for such work. But we can start with such work in our own households, and then try our best to look for such opportunities with the broader community. Thanks for the comments!
This is such a good series, and it ties in so well with how I’ve been feeling about life lately, as did your talk on “The Intentional Household”. Have you heard of the book “Radical Homemakers” by Shannon Hayes? It also ties in well with these posts.
Jenn, I think someone else just told me about that book. I will definitely check it out. Thanks so much for the thought!
Very helpful “second steps,” so to speak, of things to consider after “putting first things first” in one’s heart as you mentioned in your previous post. I enjoyed thinking about how the two “steps” (if I may call them so), were linked.
Emily, I’m so glad that you made that connection! We are certainly thinking along the same lines.
Well said, Dr! It can be hard to put first things first, and to step back from being so constantly busy. But simply to ask the question of “what have I become?” And to recognize the problem is a good first step.
Tom, Well said. Thanks very much for sharing.
I wonder if our faster technology that permits us to get more things done also permits us to take on too much, which causes stress. I am in my 30s, yet growing up, a phone number had to be looked up in a phone book, and a call (or a driving trip) made to find out information. Once the information was found, a form had to be filled out and mailed. It took time to do all these things. Now, there is a certain urgency to look online, fill out the form, attach it and email it, wait for reply, then take certain action steps. What used to take weeks or months can now take mere minutes. That in and of itself is not all bad, though I fear that when there is outside pressure, or simply having taken on too many responsibilities, that the stress of all the things to do becomes simply unbearable.
As an aside, I have always admired the Amish, and their way of life, and more recently the hermits or monks in abbeys. It seems simpler, yet, they must have things to do throughout the day to continue. There must be elements I can incorporate into my own life.
Sonrie, I find your comment very much to the point. I think our technologies accustom us, and even pressure us to achieve immediate results. I completely agree that this is part of the context that makes us feel as though we should be able to get ‘more’ done. In reality, however, ‘more’ may actually mean less, looked at from a higher vantage point. It will take restraint, and even humility, to restrain ourselves from attempting too much. Thanks for the comment.
I love this post. I have been reading your blog for about a year or more now. I like the content and the new layout works great! I had to have a giggle though. As a mother of four my eyes gravitated to the mother in the image here. HE might be pursuing a moment of rest in that moment but mother to the right is certainly multitasking. She feeds, she works, she even is engaged in a business transaction it appears. Nonetheless, she might be doing all this this from a place of rest, or, perhaps that moment lies on the horizon somewhere. She may not be anxious at all (hopefully the breastfeeding/calming hormones are doing their job)! But I laughed, because a mother’s work is never done – or it seems the artist portrayed that timeless truth!
Dear Marlon, I love your comment! So true, so true. There is something about the work of a mother, and her ability to ‘keep it all together’ that remains something of a wonder to us men. It is a great part of the image isn’t it?
But even mothers, and perhaps especially mothers, can be stretched too far, can’t they? God bless them in their wide generosity. Thanks so much for this comment.
Oh yes they can! As I begin to explore homeschooling I am bombarded just with the prospect of anxiety that it may bring and I want to run the other way. But I know I can venture there from a place of rest. Thank for your thoughtful choices of art in your blog. They are a treasure. God bless!