Over the years, I, and many others I know, both before and after getting married, have grappled with the issue of giving up dreams. It is difficult and nuanced. And it is especially important for how we think about, and live, marriage.
My basic conviction is this: the now common assumption that we can have it all, or do it all, can undermine our marriage, as well as our deepest dreams. We become convinced we should pursue every dream, and we miss a great truth. The willingness to purify and sometimes give up our ‘dreams’ can actually lead to a deeper fulfillment. And no where can this become more clear than in marriage.
I want to share three short videos I recently recorded exploring this topic. Occasionally I must forego a more extended written reflection. In that rare occurrence, I will at least share something from my ongoing video production. The first video addresses the importance of our dreams and how sometimes revising or even giving them up is appropriate–in view of greater things. The second video takes up the challenging question of a difference between husbands and wives, and their giving up dreams. Finally, the third considers how sometimes we can come back to earlier dreams, but also how a choice not to go back might accomplish something even greater.
- Seeing Marriage as Natural
- A Man’s Fear About Being a Man
- For Sex to Be What It Should
- Coming to Yourself
- Physical Home as Common Ground
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Husband, father, and professor of Philosophy. LifeCraft springs from one conviction: there is an ancient wisdom about how to live the good life in our homes, with our families; and it is worth our time to hearken to it. Let’s rediscover it together. Learn more.