“Perfect love sometimes doesn’t come until the first grandchild.”
Welsh Proverb
Dear David,
I am your Mommy’s father. She calls me Daddy, and I hope that you will call me Granddaddy.
It is hard to know where to begin in what I’d like to say to you. This past Saturday, the day you came out into the world, I got to hold you just a few short hours after you were born. How time flew back to the day when I first held your Mommy. It was as though it was all one: so much of my life summed up in holding two little babies…who look so much alike!
You made the whole world stand still for me. Just being there with you, holding you, all the cares of life seemed very far away. Thank you for bringing me back to myself; thank you for bringing me back to you, and all that really matters. In your blissful ignorance of so many passing things, you seem oh so aware of things that won’t pass: like the love in your Mommy and Daddy’s hearts, and in all your family’s hearts; and how good it is simply to be; here; together.
I have to admit, it was hard for me when it came time for me to leave you. I thought of how on your Mommy’s first night outside the womb she slept on my chest, and I got to hold her for hours. She was completely dependent on me and her Mommy (your Grandmother, whom we hope you will call Babstya—we’ll explain that to you one day); and we loved it. On Saturday night I had to say goodbye to you. You slept your first night on your Daddy’s chest and your Mommy’s breast. I’m so happy for all three of you.
You have helped me realize something very important about your Mommy, and all her brothers and sisters. They are ‘mine’ to hold, for just a little while. They are mine to serve and to love, forever. When you really love, you want to be with your beloved always. But sometimes for various reasons loving—at least in this life—means not being able to be together. At least not as much as you would like.
Perhaps the deepest aspect of being a parent is not that another person ‘belongs’ to me as ‘mine.’ It is rather that she is given to me, as my responsibility, under my care for a time. Amazingly, I can have some part in her becoming more fully her own self. And then she can be a parent too, wherein she will continue to grow into herself, ever while you her child do too! I stand in wonder at the generosity and the wisdom of the plan. I will try to understand it and live it better.
I think that the place of grandparents must be most of all to rejoice in the joy of their children, and their children’s children… and to share in it, even if from a little distance.
As a parent I have had the opportunity to learn just how much my love is not about me, but about my wife, and my children. And now… now you help me see that wonderful, if at times terrible, truth all the more. And that makes me very happy. Thank you, dear David, and may you be blessed to live and to grow in love, with your parents and all your loved ones, all throughout your life.
Love,
Granddaddy
Image: Evening #1, for both of us, in an exciting new world.
Husband, father, and professor of Philosophy. LifeCraft springs from one conviction: there is an ancient wisdom about how to live the good life in our homes, with our families; and it is worth our time to hearken to it. Let’s rediscover it together. Learn more.
Congratulations! Welcome to the world, little David!
Thank you, Colleen!
Brought tears to my eyes. Such a sweet baby and granddaddy. Congratulations to you and Sofia!
Thank you so much Amy! Sweet is the word for babies, isn’t it?
That is sooooo very beautiful John. Congratulations to you and your entire family and may God Bless you always!
Xoxo
Thank you very much, Aleksandra!
Congratulations! Many blessings on all your family!
Thank you very much Angela!
John, thank goodness there are people in the world like you, capable of articulating and recording these wonderful feelings for us less communicative guys.
You are too kind and self-deprecating, I’m sure. But it is my pleasure to give a try… Thanks Dick.
Oops! You need to add something to your bio now . . . “husband, father, grandfather . . .” – That sounds better! Huge congratulations to you and Babstya! (and especially to the new parents!) with love and prayers, Suzie and Tony!
I like it. A great bio addition indeed! Thanks so much Suzie and Tony!
What wonderful news! Our joy and prayers go with you and Sofia, and also with Joe and Paulina.
Thank you for sharing this with us, and also for continuing to teach us, even in this moment of celebration. “Perhaps the deepest aspect of being a parent is not that another person ‘belongs’ to me as ‘mine.’ It is rather that she is given to me, as my responsibility, under my care for a time. Amazingly, I can have some part in her becoming more fully her own self. ”
What a reminder: “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” And the people that are given us, to hold for that time, before they go out on their way. A beautiful picture of the stewardship we are called to.
God bless you all, John!
Thanks so much Josh. Somehow your expressing it this way makes it clearer to me! You all are in our prayers too.
Well, thank you for the tears! ❤️ Congratulations on your beautiful grandson, David. There is nothing like being a grandparent…and each visit with them just gets better! Thanks for the insights.
Thank you Cathy! I’m already suffering from not having seen him for three days.
Oh wow! As I wipe away the tears I am easily taken back to when my 1st grand baby was born, almost 20 years ago! So many of the same thoughts (although not nearly as well “articulated” in my mind) went through my head as I first held Vincent! What an extremely special moment, just holding him and staring at this little miracle! Congratulations to your family and thanks so much for sharing!
Thank you very much, Ginger. Who knows, great-grand children could be just around the corner for you!
Oh Happy Day, indeed! Congratulations, Grandaddy! And how lovely that you want to be called Grandaddy, the circle of life and love and God’s Hand upon all is so beautiful and joyous!
I am so excited for you and Sofia and and of course all the C&C’s as a new beautiful life is welcomed.
I look forward to meeting David!
With love, Maura
Thank you very much Maura! It is indeed a special honor for me to be addressed as my own Granddaddy was! We look forward to seeing you.
What a lovely article! David and all of you are blessed to have one another. I will be forwarding this to my children as it is so rich in family love and warmth.
We are expecting our 27th grandchild in July. Mike and I are called Gammy and Papa. We love them all.
Wishing you and your family a blessed life together.
Miss Janet, Thank you so much, and here’s wishing you the same!