Though self-knowledge has been praised by great thinkers from ancient times to the present, we don’t give this all-too-rare quality the attention it demands. The importance of self-knowledge is probably most noticeable precisely when it is absent. And alas, often we become aware of this absence in others without noticing it in ourselves. So we lack knowledge of our own lack of knowledge, of ourselves!

The good news is that as soon as it dawns in our awareness we can resolve to do something about it. Now, it is easier to search for something—especially something hard to find—when we know why it is important. Here are three reasons we can consider.

The first is the most obvious. Self-knowledge is the foundation for our efforts at moral improvement. Too often we set out with the best of intentions to work on developing this or that virtue without having done the work of making a rigorous self-assessment. An example might be courage. We have a general sense we need to work on it, but our efforts are hindered because we lack a clear view of our current status and why we struggle in this area. Understandably, it is difficult to come such self-knowledge; we will need help.

This very need points to the second reason to search for self-knowledge: it is essential for true friendship. Here we bump up against a key truth of life: we need self-knowledge to be friends, and we need friends to come to self-knowledge. This is paradoxical, but not contradictory.

We pray to the Lord to preserve us from hidden faults. Surely, a major way that he answers this prayer is through friends. Indeed, please God, grant us friends who really know us and love us—yes, who know us especially because they love us. And grant that they will share what they see, and that we can really hear them.

It sounds so simple. Yet I think this is one of those points where we must stop and take a very hard look. (This can be the first step toward the self-knowledge we so badly need!) Do I rejoice when the voice of another brings my shortcomings into focus? Or do I turn away, or get defensive, or simply shut down? It is one thing to give lip-service to self-knowledge; it is another thing to welcome the painful situations that can bring it about.

How many of us suffer in various degrees of isolation and loneliness, and this perhaps in large part due to our failure to realize how we are indisposed for friendship? Again, from hidden faults preserve us, Lord. Give us eyes to see ourselves and our loved ones, and ears to hear when they share what they see in us.

The third reason is simply beautiful, and I take it from the writings of Catherine of Siena. Self-knowledge is a privileged path to knowing, and loving, God. Part of this is that in knowing myself I come to see how God knows, and loves, me.

Two short quotations here will have to suffice. In her great classic The Dialogue, we hear the voice of God speaking to Catherine.

“Never leave the knowledge of yourself. Then, put down as you are in the valley of humility you will know me in yourself, and from this knowledge you will draw all that you need.”
“And through all the blessings she has received from me she discovers within her very self the breadth of my goodness.”

Frankly, these words take my breath away. How wondrous. Yes, given the painful things we must see about ourselves, self-knowledge draws us to humility. But at the same time, this is part of a much larger context of love, mercy, and redemption—a context that, alone, casts humility itself in a glorious light. Somehow, in seeing myself I gain insight into “the breadth of [God’s] goodness.”

I cannot say exactly how and why this is the case. But of this much I am confident: God loves me in such a way that the truth of who I really am (and am called to be) is astoundingly beautiful. Else how would I see the breadth of his goodness through coming to know myself?

And so this redounds back to the prior two reasons to seek self-knowledge. If I can but walk the (at times terrifying) road to seeing myself as God does, this not only grounds my relationship with him, but it is also makes me capable of pursuing the human friendships I so crave. And further, my relationships with God and others will give the greatest motivation and context to pursue, by his grace, the road of moral transformation. ~ ~ ~

LATEST PODCAST CLIMBING THE MOUNTAIN OF SOLITUDE : Somehow, solitude is a key to finding the communion with others for which we all long. Sofia and I discuss the meaning and implications of this daunting and beautiful truth. Find all our podcasts HERE.

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John Cuddeback

Husband, father, and professor of Philosophy. LifeCraft springs from one conviction: there is an ancient wisdom about how to live the good life in our homes, with our families; and it is worth our time to hearken to it. Let’s rediscover it together. Learn more.